Little things

Wow, these photos are so clever! No idea how they do that but it's very effective.

Heard a great story the other day. My friend had a baby 5 weeks ago and last week her sister came to stay, so her partner and her took the opportunity to go out to dinner, leaving her sister to babysit. She said she felt like her arm was missing, but still. They had a nice meal and returned home around 10pm. Then, they realised that it was still quite early and that her sister probably wouldn't expect them back for another hour or so, so while they were alone they decided to do something they hadn't had the opportunity to do for some time...

So they parked up around the corner from their flat, put the seats all the way back, set an alarm...

...and had an hour's sleep.

Megan's send off

My lovely friend Megan is heading home to Canada on Thursday (boo! I'm going to miss her so much that I'm following her hahaha!) and last night we had a leaving do for her at The Defector's Weld in Shepherds Bush. It started off as a rather sedate affair but six bottles of wine later became rather raucous. I should point out that - if you look closely at the above picture it shall provide proof - I was strictly on orange and cranberry juice as usual. There was much photo-taking of cleavages, mainly because our friend Kat has an incredibly impressive one. So impressive in fact, that at one point, that in the spirit of frivolity and in an attempt to prove that not drinking does not equal boring, I buried my head in it. It was very comfy, so I think Cornershop were probably right - everybody needs a bosom for a pillow. Anyway, later in the night two classic drunk scenarios occurred: firstly, Megan spotted a man in a kilt and decided to see what was underneath it. The usual. The second involved the misappropriation of a traffic cone for comedic purposes. Ah the old ones are the best, are they not? A jolly time was had by all. The only thing that was bloody annoying was that somehow I managed to get a sodding parking ticket, so my otherwise frugal night actually ended up being more expensive than if I'd taken a taxi and got plastered. Bugger.

Shere luck

A couple of days ago, I had a hankering for a bit of countryside and decided to drag David with me. The weather wasn't all that great, but hey, you takes your chances in old Blighty, don't you? We started at Silent Pool, a beautiful spot which comes with the added bonus of a highly improbable ghost story. If you've been there you'll know that the water is so crystal clear - due apparently to the close proximity of the lake to the source spring - and so you can see very clearly that it's definitely not deep enough to drown in...

Once we'd had our fill of the lake, we headed off Newlands Corner, one of the most spectacular views in Surrey. Or at least it should be. In fact, due to the drizzle and general bleughness of the day, it actually looked like this:

A quick wander out of the car to see if the view could be improved upon (it couldn't), resulted in slipping in the mud and getting my jeans very dirty, so back in the car for a quick trip over to Shere village in search of a cream tea. We found one at the Lucky Duck tea rooms, where we could also buy some local farm eggs. Nice. There is also a ford in Shere (a bit where a stream goes over the road and you have to drive through the stream - remember to test your brakes afterwards!) which I delighted in going through twice for no particular reason.

On the way back I spotted a sign for Bocketts Farm, so off we went, hoping to find some animals to pet. And we found them! Lots of lambs, two of which had only been born that morning and there was still a bit of blood in the pen to prove it. Too much info? Ach come on with you, we're all born you know. We also went to watch the pigs racing. My pig - Frankie de Snorter - ambled in last, while Curly Sue romped home.

All in all, an enjoyable, if rather damp and mucky, day.

For my family: Cow Lick.

Update on the cats: We've temporarily gone back to the red disc for Rudy's sake, as he was struggling with the concept of the hole in the amber one. Gertie had no such reservations, she's been perching over the hole and doing her 'business' right down into the loo. I find it bloody hilarious! But given that Rudy went over 24 hours without peeing - despite clearly being desperate to do so - and peed for about 2 mins the moment I replaced the red disc, I think we probably need to give him a bit more time.

Problems with my comments

My comments server is playing up, so sorry if you can't comment at the moment. Am trying to work it aaahhht.

Saw Hot Fuzz last night by the way: fabulous.

Potty talk

Quick update on how the cats are doing with their toilet training. The amber disc is in place and both Rudy and Gertie have used it although, as expected, it's been a bit hit and miss.

Gertie gets full marks: I was worried when she went over 24 hours without either weeing or pooing, but then suddenly jumped up onto the toilet completely unprompted and gave a text book demonstration of how to poo straight through the hole. She then turned around and gave my howls of obvious delight the most withering look possible, as if to say "Well naturally I could do it all along; I simply chose not to." She chose to do it perfectly again today - 1s and 2s - but only time will tell whether she will continue to humour me.

Rudy is a slightly different story, gawd bless 'im. He has pooed on it twice: the first time I was there and physically repositioned him correctly over the hole once he'd started - he wasn't happy about that, but there you go - and he did seem quite chuffed with himself afterwards. The second time it was at some point early yesterday morning and he did manage to get it on the disc, but not actually through the hole. Today he chose to wee in my pot plant instead. Still, he is a boy, and males of all species tend to take a while to control their bodily functions. I'm going to keep trying until he learns.

Too much information? Don't care. I'm like a new mother regaling all and sundry with tales of the colour and texture of each nappy. You're welcome to play the part of the glazed-over, secretly uninterested and slightly disgusted friend.

Revealing my evil plan at last

So, for those of you who haven't had to suffer me going on about it, I'm ready to reveal my plans for this year. I'm buggering off, leaving the country, and bollocks to the lotta yer. Only joking. About the bollocks part that is, but I am indeed leaving ol' Blighty for a while to stretch my wings and see what else is out there.

Sad thing is that for most places (like Australia, for example) I'm already too old to get a working holiday visa (ageist bastards) and that's what I want, because I want to take a break from midwifery and do a bit of bar work or whatever for a while. My friend Megan is Canadian and is heading back out there in a couple of weeks (boo!) so I started looking into visas to visit her and found out that there was a tiny allocation of non-student working holiday visas available for those up to the age of 35. I called on the off-chance and they said that, although they had a few left, the allocation would be full within a week. I applied there and then and secured myself a lovely big fat visa.

So the plan, at the moment at least, is: rent out my flat, move in with my dad & step-mum (thanks guys!) and start saving money. Leave work at the end of July to go on a months' annual leave prior to leaving (I'm going on a 'career break' so keep my pension entitlements - woo hoo!) and maybe work a few bank shifts (like temping but in the NHS) during August to save more money. Leave for Canada in early September, fly to Vancouver, hopefully meet up with my good friend Megan and spend a few days in Vancouver then take the train over the Rockies to Edmonton, where Megan lives. Stay there and bum around for a month or so finding my feet. October: go to Banff on a job hunt. November: start work and learn to ski/board. If like it, stay till March/April, if don't, go back to Vancouver to work. March/April: travel round Canada, maybe hop over to the States for a visit to Seattle or Boston or some such place. July: back to Vancouver for Megan's wedding, then leave for Thailand. Spend a month in Thailand and then on to Malaysia & Borneo. Always had a thing about Borneo. Not sure why. Think it may be because of this: Might go somewhere else - Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos? - if I have enough money/fancy it. Then back home via 2-4 weeks in Japan. Then, who knows?

Comments and suggestions welcome...

I'm it

My friend Lisa has 'tagged' me - I thought this was some kind of modern technical thing, but is actually just naming me on her blog - to tell you five things about myself you didn't know. So here goes:

1. Sometimes I just eat Angel Delight for dinner, coz I'm a grown-up and no one can tell me not to.

2. I am currently teaching my cats to use the toilet. Yes, the actual, real, human toilet. I'm using the Litter Kwitter system which I got free from the Daily Mirror (my sister Toni reads it, not me, honest). They're only on the 'red disc' stage at the moment, and they're doing fine with that one, but we did try amber for a day or so last week and it didn't go too well. Gertie got stuck in the hole and then pooed on my duvet in protest. We'll see how attempt #2 goes later this week.

3. I have my own page on the Internet Movie Database. I have on occasion considered submitting a photo but have decided that that would be really very sad indeed.

4. I am terrified of never having kids.

5. I'm so excited about the new Harry Potter due out later this year I'm considering taking a couple of days off work just to read it.

I'm supposed to 'tag' five people to carry this on, but I don't know that many bloggers so I'll just tag my sister Jenny and the inimitable Silas.

Rachel is a Yoghurty God

I'm totally addicted to this: I can't stop eating it. I'm getting through about one big tub every couple of days. If you haven't tried it, you have to. Yum yum yum.